The Parenting Simulator

A Rose By Any Other

Very common97.2%

Give a name to your newborn baby. No pressure, right?

You've Got a Friend in Me

Very common86.8%

Establish a connection with another parent.

One Down…

Very common76.2%

Insure that your child survives the first day of school.

Family Matters

Very common73.6%

Don't let your sister go away angry in Year 4.

Pet Get!

Very common71.9%

The more the merrier, right?

Play It Laude

Common68.9%

Watch your child graduate high school.

The Circle Closes

Common68.5%

Complete a playthrough of The Parenting Simulator.

Fostering a Friendship

Common67.2%

Your longtime friend came to the graduation party.

Commode Conqueror

Common65.9%

Achieve full potty-trained status as soon as possible.

The Finder

Common59.3%

Locate something very valuable that has been misplaced.

You Like Me, You Really Like Me

Common59.2%

Raise a child who still voluntarily spends a good deal of time with you when all is said and done.

Illness Immunity

Common58.3%

You managed to prevent your baby from getting sick during their first year.

Work is Work

Common57.7%

See your offspring end up with a slightly more normal job than actor, athlete, or artist.

I Refuse to Choose

Common49.1%

Randomly select your child's gender.

Wonder of Wonders

Common48.8%

Convince your teenager that you're actually worth spending time with in Year 15.

Sustaining a Sister

Common48.6%

Your sister came to the graduation party.

Das Boot

Common45.6%

Don't let a minor vehicle issue pump the brakes on the quest for a driver's license.

Sleep It Off

Common44.9%

Help someone else's baby get a full, uninterrupted nap.

Protecting a Parent

Common44.6%

Your child's biological relative came to the graduation party.

Break Out the Packing Tape

Common41.5%

Fill the box with everything possible during the epilogue.

Seems Familiar

Uncommon39.1%

Come upon a name from another time, another place.

In Memory of Sully

Uncommon37.5%

Take a hard line on going under the water in Year 7.

We Party the Hardiest of All

Uncommon36.9%

Spare no expense when it comes to the seventh birthday party.

Paging Kenny Loggins

Uncommon31.8%

Enter the danger zone.

Climb the Ladder

Uncommon31.6%

Claw your way up to an executive position at work.

High Score

Uncommon31.5%

Help your child get top marks on a standardized test.

The Razor's Edge

Uncommon22.9%

Finish The Parenting Simulator with at least one stat at exactly 50%.

Remix

Uncommon21.5%

Receive an upgraded version of a previous gift.

Cha-ching!

Uncommon21.4%

Win the WeViewer's Choice Contest.

Get Paid

Uncommon19.5%

Extract a heavy toll to perform a household task.

A Sporting Chance

Uncommon18.7%

Watch your child go pro in their sport of choice.

Don't Look Back in Anger

Uncommon17.7%

Take a hard swerve to avoid turning onto Memory Lane in Year 11.

Good for What Ails You

Uncommon13.9%

Make a high-stakes gamble on your pet's life…and win.

Diapers or Bust

Uncommon13.5%

Allow your little one to go as long as possible without mastering the toilet.

Valedictorian Vindication

Uncommon12.2%

Watch your child graduate at the top of the class.

Get Paid What You're Worth

Uncommon11.6%

Exploit your child's laziness for maximum profit.

Access Denied

Rare9.3%

Suspend your offspring's license before it's even issued.

Ground Floor

Rare8.9%

Remain a low-level employee as long as possible.

Moonshot

Rare8.7%

Have a plan backfire in the best way possible.

Lending an (Under)hand

Rare8.6%

Sacrifice the moral high ground to boost your child's chances in Year 9.

Death by Degrees

Rare8.2%

Pay for college tuition or trade school completely out of your own pocket.

The Power of Gift Cards

Rare8.0%

Help your child pass a major audition.

The Master

Rare7.6%

Have a child who becomes a true professional in their activity of choice.

In Recognition

Rare6.7%

Travel far in order to watch your not-so-little one accept a major award.

No Means No

Rare6.0%

Be active against activities!

A Walking Insurance Nightmare

Rare5.4%

Go to the hospital the maximum number of times in the story.

Go Fish

Rare5.4%

Make a less long-term commitment when shopping for potential pets.

Family in Film

Very rare4.7%

Experience the odd sensation of being the parent of someone with an IMDb page.

Your Last Stand

Very rare4.6%

Manage to complete the best possible diorama without your child's assistance in Year 10.

Outsourcing

Very rare2.7%

Resolve an awkward sister situation by calling in an unlikely conflict resolution assistant in Year 12.