Army of Tentacles: (Not) A Cthulhu Dating Sim achievement guide & roadmap



No missable achievements (plus 69 unknown)

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Oh Hey.


Complete your first side quest.

Sticks feat. Stones

Bring Riley to a rap battle.


Buy the Gauss Rifle. [SUMMER OF STEAM]

We Represent The Lollipop Guild

Recruit Emilia first.

Is It Like Dark Souls?

Complete the game. Now please don't refund us.

To Serve Mankind

Complete act 1.

Night Terrors

Recruit Kyle first.

Cycle of Violence


Booty Call of Cthulhu

We told you this was a dating sim.

Childhood's End (the 2015 SyFy one)

Erase a sacred bit of video game history from existence. Good job.

Male Man

You went against canon and forged your own path.

Winter Quarter Finished

In New Game+, complete Winter Quarter.

Destroyer of Worlds

Complete act 2.

John Stamos, Prince of Danes

In NEW GAME +, cast Hamlet as Hamlet.


Start a cult.

Hamlet, Prince of Darkness

In NEW GAME +, cast Cthulhu as Hamlet.

I Never Sleep On Planes So I Can't Be Incepted

Game Dev Stalker

Romance Chris Avellone. [NEW GAME+]

Fall Quarter Finished

In New Game+, complete Fall Quarter.


Hogwarts and a Giant Squid

Romance a Boy Wizard. NEW GAME+.

Dragonslaying 101

In NEW GAME+, choose your hero and go bag yourself a dragon.

The Doom That Came to Sarnath

Get the ultimate weapon from Bokrug's shop.

Pusillanimous Wimp

In NEW GAME +, cast Thatcher as Hamlet.

I, For One, Welcome Our New Kitten Overlords

Save the kitties.

Mini-game: Magnusball Champion

Win a game of Magnusball. NEW GAME+.


Go Not To Wittenberg

In NEW GAME +, cast Riley as Hamlet.


In NEW GAME+, get caught in a love triangle.

Hamlet vs. Predator

In NEW GAME +, cast V. Raptor as Hamlet.

A Disturbance in the Force

Kill Chris Avellone.

Gotta Go Fast

Start the Invasion of Innsmouth ASAP.


Turn the world upside down. NEW GAME+.

Manic Pixie Girl In Reverse

In New Game+, romance Thatcher.

Original Halloween 2013 Launch Date

Do everything at the Spirit Pines location.

A Cthulhu Dating Sim

In New Game+, romance Cthulhu.

Clever Girl

Recruit the first secret party member with the second secret party member.

Dinosaur Porn

In New Game+, romance V. Raptor.

Rule 34 to the max

In New Game+, romance Riley.

Entered Baldur's Gate

In New Game+, romance Baldur.

All The World's A Stage

In New Game+, romance Hamlet.


That's not how the classic story of Hamlet goes at all. What game do you think this is? Elsinore? Buy Elsinore, it's a great game. [NEW GAME+]

Furry Lover

In New Game+, romance Hollywood.

Dirty Shoggoth

In New Game+, romance Keziah. But why?


Play the game through from beginning to end. Full run of the base campaign plus New Game+.

Male Man II

Subjugated All Pokemon To Your Will

Recruited every party member.


In New Game+, romance no one.

Waifu Run

Beat New Game+ with every romance.

Dan Akroyd

In New Game+, romance Hamlet's Ghost.

For Every Animal You Save

Kill an endangered species.

Cthulhu Saves Christmas but really kills everyone.

Holidays at Innsmouth suck.

Acheev Hunter

Pop four achievements at once. [NEW GAME+]

Join or Die

Recruited every army squad.

Look Out, We've Got A Badass Over Here

Start the invasion ASAP with all party members at max training. Base party members minimum.

Sincerely, The Breakfast Club

This Is The Famous Dead Sea Tupperware

Unlock all armor and weapons at Bokrug's shop.

They Didn't See This Coming

Get your entire party killed at the Invasion of Innsmouth. Excludes any taken to the final battle with Marsh.

"Here's some money, buy some exclusives for me"

Put on the Dustin Starcore Cosplay. [SAN DIEGO COMIC-CON]

Spice = Flow

Don't deny people their pumpkin spice. Don't be a monster. [HALLOWEEN DLC]

It Launches Vampire Kangaroos

Equip the Vampire Kangaroo Launcher. [HALLOWEEN DLC]

No Country for Old Gods

Do the quest before you're even given it. [HALLOWEEN DLC]


One shot an enemy.

Game Dev Tycoon

In NEW GAME+, review a video game. Hint hint.

Hamlet, Prince of Jams

In NEW GAME +, cast Hollywood as Hamlet.

Game Dev: Metacritic

Pants on Fire

Use the Cheat option the entire game. [DLC]