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You collected 5 Chinpokomon.
You successfully blocked every enemy attack in a single (non-tutorial) battle.
Over the course of the game, you've blocked 100 attacks.
You have joined the KKK.
You completed your first day in South Park.
Over the course of the game, you've scored 100 perfect attacks.
You've unlocked all of the upgrades for a New Kid ability.
You farted on 10 enemies in the world that were knocked out.
You defeated 3 enemies in one battle while your buddy was knocked out.
You collected 15 Chinpokomon.
You made friends with half of South Park.
You shat your pants during a boss battle.
You flung a turd of your own creation at an enemy.
You sold 300 junk items.
You befriended your father.
You have collected half of the available costume sets.
You've spent $500.
You opened all of the garages in South Park.
You've farted on people 100 times.
You befriended both crab people and gnomes.
You found Jesus while playing as a Jew.
You knocked out 3 or more enemies with a single fart outside of battle.
Defeat Kenny while having contracted Dire AIDS
You defeated the Boss Hall Monitor while wearing freckles.
Gingers have bitten you 3 times without you blocking.
You've farted on every buddy in the game.
You defeated 20 enemies using Cartman's Ass.
You've farted on animals 25 times.
Call on Mr. Slave's power while in Mr. Slave.
You've let Kenny die in combat 10 times over the course of the game.
You completed the game without selling any items.
In three separate battles, you've taken a shit in your pants.
You collected all of the Chinpokomon.
You defeated the Meth Tweekers while wearing the Evil Cartman goatee and bald cap.
Defeat Kenny while having the David Hasselhoff nose job.
You've farted on a dog while in gnome form.
You completed the game and never ended a battle with your buddy knocked out.
You farted on four major authority figures.
Everyone in South Park is your friend.
You've collected all of the available costumes.
You own all the weapons and costumes available in the game.
You interrupted 5 channel attacks by using a fart.